An Ex-Holdeman Mennonite Speaks
While this book is not historically related to the Mennonites in Belize, phsychologically it is something that other Mennonites, no matter which branch, can relate to but due to religious and cultural beliefs prefer to keep silent. The author shares her experience of physical and sexual abuse that were directed at her while a young girl in the Holdeman (Church of God in Christ) Mennonite church in the US. It is not the first time the Holdeman Mennonite church has been in the spotlight regarding sexual abuse; some years ago there were one or two scandals concerning this very issue. Yet there are more victims out there who refuse to speak out of fear of church shunning or worse yet, out of fear of being singled out for harsh criticism and lose support from family and friends.
Regarding the Holdeman church: the doctrine of the "one true church" playing a key role in their system, it happens that certain members here and there fall into a rut of salvation based on works, leading them to commit acts that would normally place the doer in prison but due to the church's desire to abstain from publicity, such things are often held under wraps. This has happened with the Holdeman church in Belize; having grown up in that church myself I can understand the story from the author's point of view.
But...having done an in-depth study on the doctrines of the Church of God in Christ, commonly known as the Holdeman church, and having visited various Holdeman congregations across Canada, the US, and all of Central America, I can also understand how some over-zealous converts may feign repentance simply to join the church only to have their true colors come out later on. They soon become disillusioned and leave the church entirely or they lose their zeal and fall into a lukewarm pharisaical life, living a double life and committing things which would shock the reader.
Back to the book: It is truly sad to read about what happened to this girl. To have those around you know what is being done to you yet refuse to help is just as painful as the physical hurt being inflicted. However, this book is about one person's experience and should be read as such. To say this book describes the Church of God in Christ in general is a serious error not because I'm trying to blindly defend them but because I'm well acquainted with their beliefs and practices to know that this woman's harrowing experience appears to be largely due to her father's twisted mentality. Also while I can understand the author's confusion with doctrinal issues, I do not agree with the way some of these doctrines are portrayed as baseless and nonsense. But then, I'm not the one in her shoes so all I can say is that it's a book worth reading.
I recommend this book to all of my readers because one thing I fervently encourage you to do: no matter which Mennonite church you are in, if you or someone you know is experiencing physical or sexual abuse, you need to stand up and speak out now! Do not wait until you are in a better position to discuss it. That time may never come. If church authorities are unwilling to recognize it, take the matter to others who can help. What is worth more, ultimately finding freedom even though it means being shunned from a group that does not support you with bringing out the truth, OR a lifetime of trauma, regrets, and nightmares?
A. Mendoza
